Thank you for having me to dinner.
I apologize for my drunken behavior:
Throwing up on your silken divan,
Using your towels to clean myself,
Disrobing in the living room while singing "This May Be the Last Time,"
Spilling wine on your Grandmother's Damask tablecloth,
Ruining your lampshade by wearing it my head,
Opening and drinking by myself your single bottle of
Chateau Lafite , 1960.